Walmer Convenience

MOST IMPORTANT TIPS TO BE A SUCCESSFUL PRODUCER OR DJ IN 2015

You have the TALENT. You have the DRIVE. Do you know the steps to fame tho? You know how to drive. LET ME GIVE YOU THE KEYS.

1. Pick your favourite Pokemon character. THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT. If you make the wrong choice of Pokemon YOU ARE FUCKED. YOU WILL NEVER LIVE IT DOWN. YOU WILL NEVER WORK IN THIS/ANY TOWN AGAIN. Choose the right one and you are already halfway to fame.

Pokemon

2. Remix R&B from the 1990s and 2000s AND CALL IT FUTURE. This is also VERY important. YOU MUST use the word FUTURE in the name of the genre. FUTURE Bass, FUTURE Dancehall, FUTURE Fellatio Step. #AALIYAH

asb-66yqdn0r7e11rwav8uy_original

3. MAKE LOT’S OF COCAINE FRIENDS. The more friends you have THE BETTER YOU CAN DJ or PRODUCE. THIS is a FACT. No one understands why or how this WORKS but it does. IT IS ONE OF THE LAST MYSTERIES. ONE OF THE LAST SOURCES OF WONDER AND MAGIC in an increasingly chaotic world. #FRIENDSHIPISMAGIC #COCAINEISMAGIC

4. BUY a GHOST producer

5. COVER UR FACE or DO THE YUNG PRAYER HANDS in ALL photos.

cashmere-cat-nlv

6. CREATE a clothing line. It MUST be all BLACK. It MUST have WHITE WRITING. Please make use of SKINNY WHITE CHICKS for ADVERTISING.

streetwear

7. Take MEME pic someone else made. Post MEME pic on FB/TWITTER/INSTAGRAM/LINKEDIN. Act like you made it by putting your name on it.

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8. BUY A SHITLOAD OF FANS YOU IDIOT

9. Find American ghetto club music and MIX with POKEMON. IF you chose the right character.

Now you are FAMOUS

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This entry was published on February 10, 2015 at 6:14 pm. It’s filed under Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

4 thoughts on “MOST IMPORTANT TIPS TO BE A SUCCESSFUL PRODUCER OR DJ IN 2015

  1. Ugh sounds like your talking about woogie and heavygrinder! LOLOL

  2. You forgot “own a cat”

  3. you forgot to, yknow, buy your stock photo. because supporting photogs is super lame anyway.

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